The Ashes Urn in 1921 when it was still owned by Lord Darnley (Ivo Bligh).
Ben Stokes said England "let the pressure get to us" in their dismal second Test defeat. This is just a way of excusing a lack of application of skills, only learnt properly in domestic cricket.
Yes, it’s another Ashes think-piece, from another depressed England fan. In the next week, before the third Test, there are going to be any number of theories about why England lost, and why they can’t perform.
So I thought I’d add my perspective, as a long-condemned Middlesex and England fan.
Lots of speculation has been about England’s preparation, and their attitude. And it feels almost too easy to jump to that as a reason.
After the first Test, Ben Stokes made a few telling comments, as reported by the BBC, which on face value are understandable. He said:
“If they think it is going to stop us enjoying this country when we have time off then it is not going to do that”.
After this comment, Ollie Pope told his teammates who went out on scooters without a lid, as per the law there, to wear a helmet. There was an awkward interview or two thereafter. Obviously this is a storm in a teacup, but England really should know how this machine operates by now. Every misdemeanour is going to be capitalised on.
Stokes continued, that: “Australia is the best country to tour away from cricket. There are so many things to do. You can go out and about and see things that only Australia has to offer, great golf courses, coffee shops and easy places to have lunch.”
He said that being able to “free your mind” and “enjoy yourself” is “one of the most important things” for players on tour.
“We are human,” he said. “We need to enjoy countries when we get the opportunity because we live in England where it is miserable, freezing cold and dark at 4pm.”
These comments made me really angry.
Yes Ben you are human. But, you are not on holiday. You’re the captain of England, this is your job.
England are there to play cricket, a career which most rubbish clubbies like me, would give an arm and a leg to do.
England should not need added motivation to play in the Ashes.
Sorry, but seeing the country, and “enjoying yourself” isn’t why any England player is there. It is a by-product, at best, of touring.
And needless to say, England fans are fully aware that in England it’s miserable, freezing, cold and dark.
The one ray of hope and sunshine, was seeing an England team compete in the Ashes; and instead, the first Test went two days, and the second Test; I wish went two days.
Meanwhile thousands of Brits have flown out to Australia, spending a huge amount of money on travel and tickets; only to be treated to a sub-par performance, whinging that England haven’t had enough down time, and after the second Test, Ben Stokes saying the team couldn’t deal with the pressure, and McCullum saying they ‘over-prepared.’
None of these external factors are good enough reasons or excuses for the performances.
Long term and short term preparation
Much has been made of England’s preparation for both Tests. Before the first, they were roundly criticised for not playing a proper warm up game, instead opting for some kind of intra-club affair.
Then before the second Test, which was a day/night game, England chose not to prepare with a pink ball game.
Only three fringe players went to Canberra for a match, Jacob Bethell, Josh Tongue and Matthew Potts; none of whom were used by England in the Test itself of course.
Curiously, England Lions won that Prime Minister’s XI game, with four of the top six notching up half centuries.
James Rew, who already has 14 professional centuries, scored 92*, while Jacob Bethell, who has just the one hundred in his career and has never got a First Class ton, failed.
Bethell is in the Test squad, and had been tipped to play from the start, while Rew is a reserve in the Lions.
This situation perfectly crystallises England’s approach, where potential trumps record.
The sanctimonious attitude of not needing to practice in the conditions they’ll be playing in is unforgivable. But the reliance on unproven players, needs much more careful examination, not least because it trashes the meritocratic nature of county cricket.
The disparity in which England and Australia approach this, is night and day.
Australia show why domestic cricket still rules
Australia, who were about to drop Marnus Labuschagne before the series, sent him back to the domestic game. He smashed five centuries before the Ashes.
Travis Head, who had a torrid time in the ODI series vs India, requested to go back to Shield cricket before the Ashes. He didn’t get many runs, but the attitude is key. He recognised the need to at least show willing, to get back into playing red ball cricket, as appropriate preparation for a Test match.
We all know what happened in the first Test. Now, there’s no way to know if that Shield game helped him prepare. But it’s certainly curious.
And it doesn’t stop there. Brendan Doggett played domestic cricket before his Test debut, taking 5/66 and 6/48 in consecutive games.
Steve Smith returned to New South Wales notching up a ton and two fifties (one unbeaten).
Cameron Green, a player plagued by injuries, returned to domestic cricket, smashing 94 before the series.
Alex Carey scored a pre-Ashes 50 and took 7 catches in domestic cricket, while Scott Boland bagged a five-for also.
And perhaps the most case in point selection by Australia, was Jake Weatherald, who was the top run-scorer in the Sheffield Shield last year, averaging 50.
It’s not rocket science, is it?
Playing cricket is good preparation, for playing cricket.
Rewarding those for doing well, might lead to the team doing well.
Rather have Dad’s army than a team acting like brats
Australia have been labelled ‘Dad’s army’ before the series, because of the age profile of their players, and the number of injuries piling up. Only Cameron Green is under 30 years old, while Pat Cummins and Josh Hazlewood were both unfit.
But unlike England, they are playing in the present.
In the first Test, without Cummins and Hazlewood, they turned to reliable domestic bowlers, who did the job bowling line and length; constantly coaxing hapless England into driving on the up.
In the second Test, they even had the luxury of not playing Nathan Lyon, as Michael Neser took five bowling the style of seam that you’d often see in English domestic cricket.
When I turned on the TV, they kept referring to his ‘shoebox’; meaning the very accurate grouping of balls he was sending down, in a small square outside off stump of the left-handers.
It was pooling all of his experience into the performance.
England ignored the reports about pitches in Australia being different to years gone by. They ignored reports about the ball offering more help than in previous years.
They packed their side with so-called pace, but not with match fitness. Heads dropped, paces dropped, and of course, catches were dropped; which is perhaps the most clear symptom of an underprepared team.
If England had been informed, even a little bit, by domestic performance over recent years, a line and length bowler like Ollie Robinson or Sam Cook, should have at the very least been in the squad, let alone the team.
What next for England?
I write this while England are two nil down. I don’t know what will happen in the third Test, but given England haven’t won a single game since 2011, with two whitewashes in that time, I am not hopeful.
I am resigned to the fact, that England will lose this series, certainly without winning a game; but probably five nil.
I think that’s existential for ‘Bazball’, but quite honestly, I am more worried about the levels of trust between England fans, and those in charge of running the game.
The ECB are asking for upwards of £100 for a ticket to Test matches next year. I already bought one before the Ashes, because I like to go to one Test a year if I can.
But quite honestly, I don’t know if I want to go anymore.
Certainly not unless something changes. Not unless this stubborn management decides to listen, instead of doubling down, and tripling down with each loss.
The first thing I would do, is look at domestic cricket.
I am not saying the top run scorers and wicket takers need to be automatically selected.
That would be daft.
But selectors, whoever they are post this tour; must start considering players who are the top run scorers and wicket takers.
England also need to abandon their absurd policy of picking players without any speakable record, other than being the ‘right kind of person’, or having ‘potential’.
It’s starting to really feel like an old boy’s club.
Fans might accept this when the team is doing well. But when they’re failing, and refusing to wrestle with why they’re failing, then fans will be vocal.
England’s captain and coach have tried to present this double loss as being the result of anything but the cricket.
But both structural problems, like county cricket being pushed to the fringes, and poor decisions from within that management, has led to this.
The Bazball cult’s failure to accept responsibility, its doubling down on poor decisions, and constantly blaming external factors for poor performance, is no longer acceptable.
